Sometimes, life can be tough – very tough. Even utterly unfair from time to time. And as a matter of fact, we can hardly ever do anything about it. But at the same time, this applies to everybody. Even the most perfect person, living the most perfect life (as you might think) – experiences those moments. They simply exist. But so does the upside. And that’s something always worth believing in when you’re going through a nasty situation. Because how you’re handling the situation, will ultimately determine how you’ll be able to escape this unlucky stroke of fate.
Being pushed off the path once, is one thing. Having the same thing happening several times in a row – is just awful, discouraging, disappointing and energy-sapping. I know this, because I have experienced it. ‘It’s not nice’ doesn’t quite do it justice – back-breaking or gruelling are more suitable terms. But no matter how many times you got kicked in the ass and thrown off your path – the way back is always more or less the same, essentially. It’s about getting back up on your feet, straighten your crown, take a deep breath and carry on.
That’s essentially how it needs to be done. Practically, I found that the part of getting back up again can – depending on the situation – become very challenging, the more downfalls you’ve already experienced (in a row!). On the other hand, I believe, that every time you’ve fallen down and got back on your feet again in your life, does make you stronger. Because every time you’ll learn something new about yourself and your abilities to handle different situations and challenges. That’s the good thing about failure: No matter how upsetting the situation, there is always something to profit from – sometimes more obviously than other times.
But given you do understand and agree about the basic idea and tactic of getting back on track – but you’re still struggling to actually make it happen, I’ve made this list of a few simple tricks that have helped me (so far) to regain a good and healthy posture:
Spend time with yourself: There is so much going on in your head and mind, take the time to sort it out – you can’t go on before you’ve dealt with the residual fragments.
Move: Doing sports or going for long walks do not only provide your and your brain with fresh air but the movement will make your body feel better and more energised.
Pamper yourself: Even though, you might feel like you need to concentrate on solving all your problems at this point, don’t forget to take extra-care of yourself now. By doing so, you’re showing yourself the necessary appreciation you deserve.
Be patient: It might take time (and patience definitely isn’t my strength), but eventually things will start to shift and happen.
Focus on positive aspects of your life: Even though you might feel like everything is bad and going downhill – there are always things to appreciate (your health, your relationships/friendships, your hobbies, your pets, the weather, your skills, simply the presence of all theoretical possibilities, and so on).
Write it down: Since you’re probably going through quite some emotional rollercoaster, I’ve found it very helpful to put my feelings and thoughts on paper. That way, you’re not only kind of dumping those things but you’re also naming them, which can be very helpful.
Be kind to yourself: Now I the time to be ‘egoistic’. Pay special attention to what you need and make sure to go for it. If you need time – take it. If you need distance – try to get some. Whatever it is, and whether it makes sense to anyone else or not, you need it. You can therefore see it as an investment.
And once you’ve managed to re-build your inner strength and confidence, just try to ease into life again. Step by step. Because the whole experience is a process – and a process seldom happens overnight. And try to incorporate all those things you’ve experienced learnt about yourself and found out. That way you can turn the mishap into an advantage. Keep growing – at whatever pace suits you best.
Photos taken by my brother