Do you know that feeling when you believe to be confident and happy with yourself – but all of a sudden realise that it might have not been bad admittedly, but that it can be even better? I have had one of these moments yesterday, when I was listening to different, very inspirational women – talking about confidence. And since the ideas behind it are so good, I really want to share them with you.
In my opinion, confidence is a very complex topic. And far too often we only hear about all the advantages of confidence and how it can boost your productivity, social life, attitude, health and overall wellbeing. And yes, most if is true! But in order to ripe all those benefits, one first needs to get to this point of inner happiness! So, in today’s post it’s all about the approach to confidence. Since this is a rather tricky issue and very, very individual, there really isn’t a one-fits-it-all kind of plan to follow and in the end live happily ever after. First of all, you and your surroundings are constantly changing and therefore your approach needs some adjustments regularly. It’s a life-long-project. Secondly, there are so many factors coming into play (childhood, current situation, psychological state, relationships, friends, family, character – the list goes on and on), that your approach, ultimately, MUST be your very personal one. You can’t just copy and paste. You can copy, paste and adjust to your needs – take the inspiration you need and work with it!
So, here are a few inspirational ideas and concepts, I’ve picked up over time – and that have helped me quite a bit in cherishing myself more:
Daily affirmation: This might sound like a waste of time or as if you’d lie to you – but writing down things you would like to hear from others or that you would like to believe yourself (for example that you’re beautiful and strong and smart, etc.) can do wonders for your confidence. It’s no news that those daily(!) reminders will eventually start sinking in and manifesting themselves in your consciousness. So, you’ll become what you tell yourself to be. And even if at first it might not feel like it’s doing anything for you – keep it up. I had this feeling too but eventually – without even noticing really – it had already worked.
Treat yourself not like yourself: If you tend to be too harsh, impatient and relentless with yourself, start treating yourself like you would treat other important people in your life. Most likely, you’d have to be far nicer, kinder, more patient and supportive with yourself – which you definitely should do. Beating yourself up on a regular base cannot do anything good to you.
Write a list of your strengths and weaknesses: You can do so every month, every week, every day – however often you like/need to hear and see it. It’s none of anybody’s business how often you tell yourself that you’re good at something or what you might want to work on a little. You don’t need to explain yourself. You just do you.
Perspective: Simply give a f*** sometimes. Consciously. Really! Because, even if it might feel a little egoistic – who cares? Everybody around you is giving a f*** from time to time! And not only do you have the right to do the same, it also feels good because you no longer feel responsible for everybody and everything (which you aren’t anyway). Give yourself a break!
Surround yourself with good energy: Last but not least – be picky about the people you surround yourself with. Better have only a handful of really good friends than a bunch of maybe cool, but self-centred and indifferent people with bad vibes. And don’t worry, you can feel those vibes. Whether you feel energised and uplifted after meeting someone or exhausted and empty – you can tell the difference.
You’re living the life you’re living now, only once. And no matter, whether you believe in reincarnation or not or any other kinds of numerous lives – this fact is fundamentally true. And while you’re at it, you might as well make the best of it, right? So, go out there, kick ass, grow, show yourself to the world! And always be happy and proud of who you are – because you’re unique.
Photos by Lars Karlsson